Haunted by a Grapefruit

I often see interesting things on the side of the road while driving. My mother and I used to play a game when I was younger that involved things abandoned by the road. The game consisted of spotting something out of the ordinary in a ditch or median and saying aloud to the other person, "Hey, there's my shoe! (or shirt, or couch cushion, or bucket, ect.) I knew I'd left it somewhere!" I'm not sure why, but this was hilariously funny and we would both laugh. The more seriously and regretfully sounding you could say something like that, then the more fun the game became. Whoever thought of doing it first during a car ride was rewarded by the moment of confusion on the part of the other person as they hesitated a moment in belief of your words. To this day, I still play this game occasionally on road trips...even if I'm alone.

One morning this week I came to the intersection of a country road to a larger highway, where I turn onto the highway on my way to work. In the intersection that bridges the median between the two sides of the highway was a grapefruit. The fruit lay directly in front of my car and I couldn't help but stare at it. A grapefruit? Sitting in an intersection? How did it get lost? Where was it going? All of these questions raced through my mind as I stared at it. During that time I was also waiting on the oncoming traffic to allow me to turn onto the highway. When my chance came, I turned right as usual and then decided that I was going to do something ridiculous - I was going to turn around at the light just a short distance away and go back to pick up the grapefruit.

This may seem like a strange whim to act upon, but that is often how I operate. When I lived in Boston, I once found a tangerine in the snow on the sidewalk as I was walking home from work. I picked it up and ate it while I walked. It was delicious.

Though I had to laugh at myself for turning around to get a grapefruit stranded in the middle of a highway intersection, I was anxious that someone might run over it during the two minutes it took me to turn around. I worried that someone would see me pick it up and think I was insane. I wondered how I was going to pick it up without getting out of the car or running over it myself. I needant have bothered with all of these thoughts. When I got back to the intersection, it was gone.

It took me exactly two minutes to turn around at the light and make it back to the intersection where I had planned to make a U-turn and pick up my free grapefruit. I was actually shocked when I got back to the empty intersection. I quickly scanned the grassy median for my run away grapefruit and scanned both sides of the road for the crushed citrus victim of a careless driver. It simply wasn't there. It was gone.

I decided that as strange as I felt my impulse was to pick it up, someone else must have indulged the same whim and taken it before me. Oddly enough, I felt robbed! Who had stolen my grapefruit?!? Who had deprived me of a delicious addition to my PB&J lunch?!? After I got back on my route to work, I looked around at the other cars on the road and wondered who could have taken my grapefruit. It was silly, but I couldn't help it.

I know it wasn't just a figment of my imagination. Despite the ridiculousness of the whole situation, I regretted not getting out of the car, crossing the road, and picking it up before I turned onto the highway. Yes, I know I'm insane. But grapefruit are delicious!